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Contents
Introduction
Domestic violence is a conflict that takes place at home. It is a conflict that is perpetuated by one member of the family against the other. It may be perpetuated by the father towards the mother and children. Alternatively, it may be perpetuated by the mother against the father and children. Sometimes, even children become sources of violence, which they direct towards their parents. Domestic violence may arise as a result of social causes and emotional causes(Anderson, 1997).
(a) Social causes
There are many social causes that result in domestic violence. These social causes include:
Problems in a relationship
In most cases, problems in relationships bring about conflicts within a family. These problems may arise out of lack of communication. When family members do not communicate that aspirations, wishes, ambitions, hopes and fears, other family members fail to understand what motivates them to behave in the manner that they do.
In some families, the spouses are too busy in the workplace to make time for their family members. For this reason, problems arise as far as the task of creating social bonds is concerned. In most cases, it is parents who fail to give their children the attention the need in order to provide them with guidance. At other times, it is one of the spouses who fail to nurture a serious love relationship with her wife in order for their relationship to be strengthened. In this situation, one of the spouses can easily feel out of touch with the family, causing dissent, conflict and violence.
Lack of trust can also lead to domestic violence. A family is the most basic organizational unit. For it to function, the husband and wife have to live in harmony. These two people cannot live in harmony without a build-up of a bond of trust between them. Each partner should always be sure of the other person’s trust and loyalty. Decisions should involve all parties. Unfortunately, this sometimes does not happen, leading to conflicts.
Sometimes, children also cause conflicts when they feel that their parents no longer trust their abilities and aspirations. If their needs are not being taken care of, they may think that the parents do not trust these children’s’ abilities although this may not be the case. Some parents direct their trust to some children and they deny it to others mainly because of perceived weaknesses and strengths. In this way, they pity these children against each other, a situation that leads to a bitter conflict that lasts for a very long times.
Misunderstanding is another social problem that manifests itself through problems in a relationship. Sometimes, the actions of one family member are misunderstood by the other family members. For instance, all family members may fail to understand why the father has decided to spend all the previous years’ savings to pay for his advanced education while the children have been sent home from school for lack of school fees. Although the father may mean well for the family by taking this action, no one may realize this since there is a misunderstanding of his actions.
When misunderstandings occur, it is easy for every person in the family to blame the person next to him, especially if this misunderstanding has caused a major blunder, an accident or damage to the reputation of the family in the eyes of the public. Misunderstanding may lead to lack of trust, something that leads to serious problems in relationships. Clarification is needed all the time in order to avoid misunderstandings from taking place.
Infidelity is another major cause of domestic violence. Infidelity means lack of faithfulness by one spouse. A spouse may decide to commit adultery when the other not around or is looking the other side. When this spouse comes around or turns towards that other side and finds the spouse committing adultery, domestic violence arises.
Domestic violence continues until behaviors of infidelity come to an end. In the worst cases, it continues long after the spouse has stopped engaging in unfaithful behaviors. This is because the other spouse may not have completely lifted the burden of the offense caused off his heart. In most cases, such a cause of domestic violence is very serious and a third party may need to interrupt. The worst scenario is whereby such violence ends up in divorce.
Personal reasons
Through personal reasons, one of the parties in the family becomes the aggressor. The aggression may be caused by various factors. The aggression may emanate from one family member or it may involve an ‘all against all’ kind of situation. In most cases, this kind of problem becomes very difficult to deal with. This type of violence may take the form of fights whereby family members intentionally hurt each other, physically, emotionally and psychologically.
Physical or mental illness is a common cause of personal aggression in the family. The remedy to this problem is medical attention. Some of the mental conditions that lead to aggression in the family include schizophrenia and Alzheimer’s disease. Family members may not realize that a mental condition is fuelling the violence until it is too late.
Carlson(1984) observes that people who use alcohol or drugs are also a cause of domestic violence in their respective families. This is a personal problem that can be remedied simply through a change of behavior. Unfortunately, it is never as simple as that. Alcohol and drugs are not only highly addictive; they take away a huge chunk of a family’s resources. One family member may drain all the family’s resources by buying drugs, leading to a domestic quarrel.
An individual who has been exposed to domestic violence all his life may expose the same behavior towards his family. This is because that individual has been conditioned to a life of violence since early childhood and beyond. For such a person, it is difficult to understand what that there may be another form of life other than one that is characterized by violence. In this case, violence may reign as long as the family exists.
(b) Emotional causes
Klein(2008) notes that domestic violence can also occur when a family member is under emotional stress and intentionally or unintentionally transfers this stress to other family members. Emotional causes may be due to various reasons:
Anger
It is a very normal thing for one to be angry. However, different people act in different ways when they are angry. Some people fight with family members while others stay away from them. Some recover from this emotional feeling while for others, this feeling lasts for days, even months. Either way, domestic violence may arise from anger. An angry person may hurl insults at family members. He may also chase them away from the home. There are incidences where anger has driven some people into killing their spouse and children.
Stress
Stress can drive people from abandoning their marital responsibilities. When a spouse is under stress, he cannot perform his family roles in the right way. When this happens, other family members complain. This complains may make the stressed person’s condition worse, leading to a situation whereby the condition gets worse with time, finally getting out of hand.
Stress may be work-related or it may emanate from overwhelming family responsibilities. Either way, it is upon all family members to express their understanding of an individuals suffering. Without this understanding, the stress condition can only get worse. Thomas(1993) says that people who are under stress may direct violence towards their families as a way of attracting attention to their problems. When no family member seems to take notice, the situation gets worse with time, finally ending in the disintegration of the family.
Jealousy
When parents treat their children unequally, those who are discriminated against may complain. The complaints may lead to violence when no one heeds them. Fights among children often arise because of unfair distribution of resources. Some children may be given access to all the educational and emotional resources while other children get none. It is difficult for the children who are treated in this manner to sit back and watch this happen.
Poverty
Poverty in the family may drive everyone into a feeling of helplessness. According to UNICEF (2006), poverty is the leading cause of domestic violencein most poor countries. Unemployment, high costs of living and general impoverishment easily drives family members into being susceptible to violence. For some people, violence is a good way of shifting emotional attention from the existing problems. When poverty reigns, there are high chances that conflicts relating to matters of resource distribution will arise.
Media
The media remains a very influential force in all facets of our societies. The family may be depicted in movies as a flawless institution that is glamorous all the time. This is very far from the truth. Unfortunately, people do not understand this, something that makes them try to act out what they see on TV in their own family settings. When things do not work out their way, this may lead to emotional turmoil that fuels domestic violence.
Additionally, children who have been brought up in an environment where they watch violent movies all the time end up becoming adults who are emotionally immature. They become violent for no apparent reason since they think that life should be all about violence.
References
Anderson, K. (1997) Gender, Status, and Domestic Violence: An Integration of Feminist and Family Violence Approaches, Journal of Marriage and Family, 59(3), 655-669.
Carlson, B.(1984) Causes and Maintenance of Domestic Violence: An Ecological Analysis, The Social Service Review, 58(4)), 569-587.
Klein, A. (2008) Practical Implications of Current Domestic Violence Research
Thomas, D. (1993) Domestic Violence as a Human Rights Issue, Human Rights Quarterly, 15(1) 36-62.
UNICEF, (2006) Domestic Violence, Retrieved on April 27, 2010.
